Dia Adalah Hanie

Malam Jumaat (:

2009-08-27T16:31:00.000-07:00

salam peeps.
today's the 6th day of Ramadhan
and tinggal 23 days lagi kan raya...
hehehe...
tapi aku baru sehari puasa.

hari ni aku inda sekolah.
i've to accompany my mum to bring Naufal to the clinic.
so,dirumah sajalah ku.

What happened d clinic?*recall dulu*
okay,basically biasa pulang saja.
bg card,duduk,tunggu kena panggil,jumpa doctor and ambil ubat.
ah iatah,yang tempat ambil ubat tu kan...
aku suka liat...
his look's way too alim and yet,ia inda jadi imam pun. He choose to jadi apa namanya ni kerja tempat ambil ubat ah???*blank*

malam jumaat aku dirumah saja.
watch tv...
hmph...
exam inda lagi batah tapi masih main-main.
malas study :-(
mcmana kan dapat merit ni lai??

"bulan Ramadhan bulan Kemaafan."

let me feel the love...

2009-08-26T05:14:00.001-07:00

salam semua..
hari ni ok saja...
i'll make it brief lah cerita ku ni..

Tadi geography sir Fletcher aher datang...
ia lupa hari ni hari rabu. ia fikir hari khamis.
Haha...
Err,then tadi bhs melayu...
Cgu Suhaili ckp arahku...
i'm his next target after Hanim yang jadi best student dlm bhs melayu nanti..
Mudah-mudahan saja lah cigu...
Doakan saja kami yang terbaik...

P.S tadi aku mcm biasa...
revising,buat homework and baca magazine sikit...
G.P test data response ah...
nada ku tejawap.Blank ku...
SOC tadi ok lah...Tambah faham...

So,hopefully i'll get through and dpt merit...

"ya ALLAH...kabulkan permintaanku"

P/S : i think i love him.

kenapa sekarang baru nampak?

2009-08-25T07:07:00.001-07:00

buta kah aku selama ni?
tadi baru tah ku realise,rupanya...
he's just too old for me...
too mature...
HAHAH...
selama ani dimana mataku ah??

He once said, cinta tu buta...
and now baru ku agree,
baru ku faham...
but its okay,i can sincerely accept him though...
hehehe...

tadi naufal ku sakit perut...
he cried sampai ia keluarkan 'emas' dari lombongnya...
kesian babyku...
after urut2 his tummy baru tah dapat ia tidur...
nyaman tidurnya tadi...

ni baru ku balik dari masjid,
edar kami tadi sediakan makanan,etc.
and there,i saw him...
Err...okay lah...
nampak that he's happy
but still i feel that ia inda happy...
i don't know lah...
malas ingau lagi...

tadi at school okay lah...
extra class pun okay jua...
L6 combine dgn U6,so i get to senyum2 back to my exmates...
dorang was so worried coz their A lvl exam's coming...
Mine pun jua,AS ah...
aku mau dapat A...
tapi i'm not sure yet...
inda ku yakin :'(

ya Allah...
tolonglah hambamu yang kerdil ini...

am i happy?

2009-08-24T07:45:00.001-07:00

heyya people...
i got nothing kan dibuat hari ni,
so i'd like to cerita lah sikit kisah hari ni...

happy kah ku hari ni ah?
err,if ckp mcm biasa...
inda jua...happy jua ku sikit...hehehe..

okay,the story basically happened tadi...
while waiting for my mum,
i saw this guy...emm,,
inda berapa nampak his face pulang...
ia pakai topi haji ah...
and what makes my heart beranti skajap was seeing his tangan...
bisai bah tangannya,ia hold the car steering tu tah...
uhh,i wish to hold his hand...slip my fingers into his...
jalan sama2 dipantai...
*waa...jauhnya angan2*
and hey! i dont know if i fantasize skajap or reality that he's smiling at me...Toink!!!
To be honest man,this is my first time after kegersangan cari next target to be fall in love with...
aiyaa...Mihirnya aku...

and tadi subuh i did dream this weird tapi siuk mimpi...
aku inda nampak muka lelaki ni but i hold his hand...
i hugged him kuat-kuat,
cakap arahnya "now i've realised how much i love u"
HAHA...WTF!!
tapi siuk,baik jua lust tu inda timbul...
weeweeweewee...

Mmm...geography's the most siuk class to attend...
though kami inda close,aku sendiri inda berapa kana kawan but i enjoyed the class.
And aku suka liat si Aiman make fun of his friends and sir Fletcher...
damn hillarious...!!
Hahah...And si roy pun cali jua mukanya...
And yeah,my groupmate...sidah...
ia banyak cakap tapi funny brabis...
Banyak clowns dlm class kami...

Okey,gtg.Esok extra Sociology,test GP,..
AAaAaAahHhHh...!!!!!!

GP test tomorrow...ARRGGHH!!!

2009-08-23T05:05:00.001-07:00

evening...
hmph...so sad,hari ni aku 'bocor' tah jua and so,
i can't puasa and terawih and also tadarus...
isk..isk..isk...;(

erm,tadi kami baru potong our baju raya...
heheh...i've to go diet from now on...
takut sempit the baju...
huhuh...
hopefully lawa lah nanti...
*angan-angan* hehehe...

Okay now,i'm at nini's house...
wasting time...
tadi i joined them sungkai.
their menu was bubur kacang and dessert...
nyaman sekali...
and again,MESTI control makan...
argh!!

so,tomorrow sekolah...
starts at 745 (mcm biasa) ends at 1230...
BLK1 esk i'll go to the library and loan that new book!!!
i need that for the sake of my AS exam!
BLK2 i'm having my GP class and mr.Frank will be giving us essay test,to examine how lame and rubish our essay is. Hahah.
BLK3 sociology with ms.Rozi...ni relax saja ni...
BLK4 geography,i think new topic kali ni...Settlement...
BLK5 bhs melayu with cgu Suhaili,the one and only cgu who loves to flirt young men. (err???)

uhuh...mesti kerja kuat ni...
1.DIET
2.STUDY

" i know i can :) "

on & off

2009-08-22T13:39:00.001-07:00

back again...
for how long ah??
hmm...

Today's the 2nd of Ramadhan and as expected,
ramai datang terawih.
However,celebration this year wasn't that 'live' as to compare dgn previous years punya...
i don't know why...
was it my own self-thinking or semua pun dapat rasa jua?...

Next,
2009 is a bad year for me...
banyak sial thing happened to me,OCCASIONALLY...
*i fucked up my life...twice...by hating my ex tapi inda dapat and seeing my closest friend kahwin (happy for him but at the same time,sedih jua)
*makin basar,mcm2 tia dpintanya perasaan+hati ni...hari2 kan minta belai...(HAHA) and so,i have to jaga my hati dgn banyak2 selawat+zikir2
*my family...if diikutkan hati,mungkin family relation kami semakin tegang...
harap2 inda...
W/pun its a bad year,
ALLAH tu adil kan...
2009...membuka ruang akademikku...
Well so far,aku okay with my study...
And starting now,i've to work harder...AS exam inda lagi lama...
i'll try to get A lah for geography...
hehehe...payah tu yo...
sociology pun...mesti A jua...
and if dapat,GP jua...B kah saja...

Mama once said,"tanamkan cita-cita dihati and jangan fikir yang lain,insyaAllah dapat jua tu nanti."
i really really really want to get that scholarship!! :'(

final exam's coming...
after raya kami exam...
and after final exam,aku sit my AS...
uhh....
honestly,inda ku sabar ni kan exam...
kan tau my result and get promoted untuk upper6 next year...
tapi...when tani inda sabar,we'll get nothing but rugi...(i learn this from his experience)

banyak2 berdoa ramadhan ani...
semua pintu syurga dibuka...
semua doa dikabulkan...
huhuhuhuh...

Oh yeah,
1 more thing...
i was not allowed to date with someone since mama did her responsibility,searching the perfect one for me...
i just hope...mama tau ciri2 yang ku cari...
this heart ache so much...
takut-takut aku bukan yang dicarinya...
tapi i'll try to be isteri yang best...
susah ni woo...
about 5-6 years lagi...
inda lagi lama tu...

LOVE

2009-07-25T23:32:00.001-07:00

to be honest, i'm nothing without you...
hari-hari yang dilalui kosong saja...
i miss your jokes...
i miss everything from you...
hari-hari,bangun tidur selalu ku tanya2...
Will u be alright?
Can she treat u well?
Will she loves you like i do?
Can u both be happy?

it is hard to let you go...
i know,i have to move on...
setiap kaki ku melangkah,setiap kali tu jua i'll look back...
searching for you...
and seperti selalu,ur not there...
sedih kan...

______________________
When ur with someone,this heart turns black...
niat hati kan marah that girl tapi diri sedar,
kalau bukan salahme,kalau me layan you macam ia layan you,
me indakan makan hati cani ni kan...
i still love you...

__________________________
online msn pun nda lagi siuk...
asal buka msn, baby nada online...
where are you?
sudah jumpa another 'honey' ka?...
i miss you so bad;'(

________________________
*diam*
...............................
There's nothing to say...
Cakap banyak pun can't bring him back...

============================
perempuan fitrahnya bersifat pemalu & put things to their heart.
cinta sejati perempuan payah kan nampak, i have to agree with this coz ni pun aku alami sendiri.
so guys,when seorang perempuan treat u well,she's the one yang kamu cari.
pilih yang zahiriah cantik pun inda beguna if batin nya nda pernah mengagungkan seorang lelaki yang dicintainya. :)

kalau hati sudah berkata "yes!she's the one..." don't let her go,do whatever it takes...
kalau sudah jodoh,yang dikejar pun indakan lari coz dihatinya pun sudah mengatakan "he's the one"
===========================

2009-06-28T03:17:00.001-07:00

hello bloggers...
it's been a while since i've posted my daily news...
So,this whole 2 weeks of school holiday i was just nannie-ing my lil sweet nephew plus i did go KNK...
My family and I went to Huaho Petani Mall (Tutong), Bkt Tempayan Pisang (near my house), Bkt Mentiri, Mentiri Golf Club and tadi we went to Wong Kadir at Labi,KB.

Ni pun baru balik dari KB,we're tired man...Lucky the cuti is extended till 6 July...
H1N1's cases rose day by day...And sure,the mentris worried..So they decided to bagi the students cuti...Pity to the teachers,they've to start their 'teaching' tomorrow...Huhuhu...

Highlight: Wong Kadir.
Huhuh...Tadi was totally fun yet tiring.
Wong means Wasai,so Wasai Kadir lah nama melayunya...Hehe..

i was so happy but frustrated.the story goes like this,tadi i manage to mandi under the waterfall which is basically 'restricted' to women...
Not that it is haram or etc,its just that jarang ada bini2 mandi bawah the waterfall...
The water's not shallow and as i'm a geography student,i knew that there'll be a plunge pool that makes the wasai DEEP...

Granting the chances given,with my mother's bless aku pun benanang lah ke tempat DEEP tu and hey man,payah gila bernafas...
Aku pun kuatkan semangat ketempat waterfall tu...Alhamdulillah sampai jua...
And semua yang ada sana,my mum,aunts,cousins were all happy and blessed including other guys jua sana...Little did they know i was struggling with the harsh water currents...HAHAHAHA...
Mencabar brabis...

Okay,time aku gasping for more oxygen...And ambil energy...Semua ready kan 'selamatkan' aku incase aku inda tahan lagi...
Lama ku 'chillax' di sana...About 15-20mins kali...Mama takut and suruh my uncle bagi pelampong...
So,my unc pun beranang lah and bagi the pelampong...Actually without the help of my unc i can still ke shore pulang...
Iatah masa my unc trying to save me,ia pun kan lemas jua...And thus makes my aunt (his wife) worry...Cian eh..And i felt guilty for that...='(

masa on the way balik lah along and mama cerita pasal how brave i am kan ke air terjun tu...
I told them i need to set strategies before going back to the shore but then my along cakap inda bulih coz the longer u're under the waterfall the harder u'll breath...So okay,baru ku faham napa durang semua takut...
Yet i'm happy jua coz aku dapat cabar my own courageness...Huhuhuh...
Alhamdulillah berkat pertolongan Allah,akhirnya semua berjalan lancar and we're all pulang dgn selamat... :)

END OF THE HIGHLIGHTED STORY.

So,n0w...Aku resting saja..And i think tomorrow i'll start revising...Hahaha..
Homeworks pun masih banyak lagi alum buat...3 lagi...

2 days ahead (exclude Thursday)

2009-06-10T03:37:00.001-07:00

ya...ba...da...ba...duu!!!
2nd term holiday's coming...
Tak sabar aku...huhuhu...
so,my current plan for this upcoming holiday is basically STUDYING!!...
Other activities,maybe...Muscle-fitting(jogging,swimming,cleaning campaign)
MAYBE lah saja tu...

After 2nd term holiday, a week after 3rd term...We're having 2nd assesment..
Lots and lots and lots to READ!!
So this cuti,like Ms.Rozi said we have to asah our skill of writing,asah our mind yang tumpul tu and more!

And again,i have to be prepared for my AS war!!
it aint easy if inda study!
i don't want to sit for the same paper again thrice!! Hohoho...

Hopefully i'll get through this...
Amin...Amin...Amin...='(

so,yeah! VICTORY!!...

officially sick x(

2009-06-07T07:18:00.001-07:00

Oh God! hectic week makes me sick...
i am now suffering the minor H1N1's symptoms. i'm on flu,dizziness, loss appetite and yeah, i'm poorly weak!
i apologize for the late update.

Well today,nothing much happen after the whole week i was busy studying,doing massive homeworks,bla..bla..bla..
huhh...
hari ni aku luangkan masa dirumah saja,rehatkan diri...Hibernate untuk esok...
Bloody m0nday,just hope everything would be smoothly fine.

urm,just wanna share u guys a story which basically boring...coz it just happened dalam mimpi,semalam.
*just skip this part,if you want*

okay, ceritanya cani...dalam my dream ni kan...
my ex contact me balik and he told me he want me back. he did give me this lovely letter,expressing his feelings...how he missed me so much,and so on..
shorten the story, at that time i wanted to make things up BUT suddenly, this friend of mine whose about to get married appear on my mind. I was confused... And what happen after that, aku muntah... Hahaha.
Funny eh.
That was my dream.

And tadi, berapa lama sudah inda jumpa this 'friend' ani ah...tiba2 terjumpa tah jua...
What was that?!
COINCIDENCE??
After mimpi ia,terjumpa lagi ia??
Err...
i'll just leave that behind.
Malaskan fikir,worthless. (:

okay,now focus on tomorrow.
esok PS,i'll be checking my geo hw and buat some revision.
GP kami learn new topic 'mass media',
SOC ms.Rozi's back...Nda tau buat apa kami...
GEO erm n0t sure yet buat apa...
BM pun i don't know.
Hahah.

So,maybe ni saja. OFF YOU GO!!

"coincidence OR destiny??"

Sajakku

2009-06-01T06:00:00.001-07:00

okay,aku baru siap buat my own sajak. My teacher mau kami karang sajak or pantun kan dibentangkan esuk.
So,aku buat sajak lah. i hope everyone nanti will 'wow' it.

Here it is...*nervous*

'kebahagiaan Mama di bulan Oktober'

22 Oktober 1990,
lahirlah dia ke dunia,
tangisannya kebahagiaan semua,
dia dirangkul erat; dikucup,
mama tersenyum;tangisan mengalir tanda kesyukuran,
Terima Kasih Tuhan!

22 Oktober 1993; 3 tahun sudah,
dia sudah petah berkata,bermanja;
"mama...mama..."
setiap keinginan dipenuhi,
cinta rohani dan material tidak puput diberi,

22 Oktober 1990,
dia berusia 5 tahun;mengenal erti ABC,123,
dia mula mengenal erti kawan,
dia yang alpa mula mengenal erti kebebasan,
bebas bermain seperti rama-rama; bebas berlari; bebas bergalut

22 Oktober 2000,
kebebasan diberi digunakan sepenuhnya,
dia asyik dikeliling teman dan keseronokkan palsu,
keramahan dan kasih sayang mama dijadikan tugu,
dilupakan dan dibiarkan termanggu

22 Oktober 2007,
sesalan mula bergelumung disudut hati,
mama pernah bilang 'ikut hati mati,ikut rasa binasa',
dia kini mula mengerti,
kebebasan dicari takkan terhenti,
namun mama tetap disisi,menjadi tugu kekuatan dihati,

22 Oktober 2009,
aku berganjak ke usia dewasa,
akan ku bentang rasa cintaku;berbahagialah mama,
dihari itu nanti akan ku peluk mama seeratnya,
Terima Kasih Buat Semuanya,Mama!

Holy Friday.

2009-05-29T08:39:00.001-07:00

today's friday.

Hari ni just jaga my bebehfruit...shopal gemuk...
He's baru 2months tapi if tani liat he's like 4months...
Kambang lagi tu...Kan becerita saja...
Since i don't talk too much kan iatah opal selalu cry...Hehehe.

Erm malam, i went to dikir...It was fun...Triak2...Spit my lungs out...Hahah.
Boring wah before ni,so apa lagi...Release stress dsana lah...
Kami dikir skajap sja tadi...So,pulangan fulus pun ok ok aja...

Apa lagi ah, today nothing much kan diceritakan...
Tidur memanjang,jaga opal,mlm jaga nini...

So,maybe ni saja lah.
Gtg.

"talk is cheap BUT i did love you...Still...Always..."
:)

addicted to you

2009-05-28T02:32:00.001-07:00

Hey,i'm here again... (:

umm..Hari ni boring...Nda ku tau kan buat apa...

Okay, tadi sociology...Still methods of research, we're asked to set up a structured questionnaire...And kami pilih pasal 'relationships & marriage'
it was Umi's idea pulang...Mau buat pasal relationships...And aku ikut lah saja...
Siuk2 lah questions kami...Hehehe...

Geography...Over/under/optimum population...

Bhs melayu blajar pasal novel sebelum perang

gp still on our project...Saturday presentation...
And ps tidur... :(

Hmph...My heart's sakit...
I really don't know kenapa...
So sad... ='(

.................

wraping my day

2009-05-27T09:37:00.001-07:00

uhuh...physically tired...
whats the time now?
0018hr??Wow... Eh,28th may sudah ni...

*flashing back*
yesterday,payday...
long queue kaliah every ATMs...
they were all smiling...
but then duit tu skajap saja d wallet tu...

kami makan d restaurant Chola,nice...
baru first time sana,so a lil bit sakai... i met Hafsah sana.She's with her sister...Makan apakah durang,i dnt knw...
For mine, i ordered chips&nuggets,roti kosong and also carrot juice...
Hehehe...Penafsuan banar...Hahahah..

And i hadnt enough rest kan tu,sampai saja rumah my aunt sampai and i have to rush...
So,i pampered myself masa jaga nini lah...4hours ah...
Usually inda ku tdur pulang tapi ani... AMPAR wah... Huhuhu

ayte, got to go...
Mau bobo...

"there's an empty place in my heart and baby, without you it'll just break apart.."

to bend and not to break

2009-05-27T00:29:00.001-07:00

i'm sitting on school's 3rd floor toilet bowl now...
manufacturing my own chocolate cookies...
hahah yuck...
"batah kan kuar..."

em okay,tadi buat apa ah...
geography's assesment final mark is out and yes,i got a C.Syukur Alhamdulillah...
I've scanned a little saja on the paper and so far,i can only see 3 passes, 2 people got C and a person gotten E. Well others,sorry to say...They've got the 'U'niversity...
Jgn putus asa guys...
Put more effort on it...

uhh too much to do on the other subject, my sociology dE'am0r...
i don't really understand much of the methods of research...
How to answer the question,which is relevant,irrelevant,which has to be memorise,etc...
need to study more...and more...and more...

tadi GP class,Muna's absent...Good luck Muna on your Maths exam...
kami tadi just relax2 saja,cerita2...And Amal asked me about 'relationships'...Unfortunately i really can't say anything about that...Totally blank...
hey guys...Not all teenagers got sweet hetreosexual relationship kaliah...So do i...
BUT i'm happy...(its a lie)

honestly, i don't want u to go away from my life. I hate to be left alone... Just go skajap saja and later on, come back to me... No matter how long will it takes, i'm always here waiting for you... Perhaps if nothing's changed lah... :)
don't end this relationship...don't break it...

once my baby, always my baby

2009-05-26T09:07:00.001-07:00

hmm...how sweet the heading is... (:
i just love it...
it reminds me of someone whose about to desert me away from his life...
at first,i do really mind for how easy he is in generalising his decisions but then... after i 'verstehen' myself into his, maybe one day i'll understand...
it's okay,baby...
tho' it really hurts but i know u're hurt too...

Okay, for the first time during my schooldays, i was crying...
can't stand the situation i'm facing now...
this is just too much...
i got no one to hang on with...to hold on...to cry to...
huhuhu...
But hey,i've got to be strong...
World's sucks...
And i dont want to be suckers...

err...
this afternoon,i just spent my time at the school library...
studying...revising...
hmph...
and hey,tadi Ms.Farah totally insane...she'd gone mad after what wafy (i dont know the person's exact name) kan manipulate her but Ms.Farah handal,she's out of the 'false consciousness' and apa lagi...jadi lah 'Ms.Farah's Rebelution'...
Kami lagi tadi ciput ganya semangat kan study...Semua tired, and this including me...Huhuhu...
Class dismissed early,later on some of my colleges cakap Ms.Farah selalu nangis after ia marah or stress...
Hey,i dont know and its normal jua bah...
Ms.Farah's nice...Well-motivated tutor...
Her handouts way too good compare to my ex tutor punya notes (mention no name)

Apa lagi...
Today banyak students absent.They sat for Eng O lvl exam.Hows the paper guys?Kacang?
Hope dapat best result lah ah...

Alright, gotta go now...

"ain't success without failure"

aluuhaa...

2009-05-25T06:56:00.001-07:00

Hey people...
I'm here again...
mcm chipsmore,ilang2 saja...

Emm what to tell ah...
maybe as a warming up, i'll tell you pasal my school life lah which obviously dull and boring but on the other hand, my academic performance dramatically increased...

i've just finished my first assesment...And here are my results...
SOCIOLOGY = A,
GENERAL PAPER = A,
GEOGRAPHY = C,
BHS MELAYU = *cg.Suhaili havent finish marking,batah wah!!*

okay, if last year punya first assesment apa ku dapat nah...
SOCIOLOGY = E
ENG. O'Level = D
GEOGRAPHY = D kali. Inda ingat
BHS. MELAYU = C

huge changes kan...
em,i'm proud of myself pulang...
Syukur Alhamdulillah that i repeat, atleast i can undo my mistakes and improved.

So yah, maybe thats all for now.

I love my family. (:

Apa ni kan...

2009-05-25T06:34:00.000-07:00

2009...

2009-02-19T17:53:00.000-08:00

hahah
buruk my blog ni, baru tah kan update,
well busy wah lately, i have to do lots and lots of 'taking care-ing' my nini sama my cousins...
last month my granddad died..*sobsob*

what else ah...
oww i guess i'll simpan pictures my sister's wedding last december lah,
though it was not fun - banyak uncles ikut campur but Alhamdulillah lah, janji selesai...
*aku kawin bila ah..sama sapa ahh...* hahaha

oh yah, i haven't started my school yet since i am repeating my lower6 dis year (failed due to my attandence bahhh...)
so aku just relax - tidur makan di rumah nini hamba lah.
nothing else's to do..
borriiinggg laaaa....
nda sabar kan skulah hehehehehehe
tapi sudah skulah tu mals2 tia, mbari malas wah ehh..pemalas... *apakan!!!*

ciow.
hanie

absent

2008-11-17T20:36:00.000-08:00

hee...not as i planned, hari ni ku inda skulah. haha.

ahir ku bangun wahh ;'( i forgot to set my alarm last night, i was fall asleep.

iatah aku kna bangunkan kul5.20, for me its ahir sudah. homework lagi blum buat. huahuahuahua.

so, lastminute decision... "Ma, Alai inda skulah.. "

haha. and my mom pun ckp, ok..

so, sambung tdur lerr.

hehehe

ne, aku dalam bilik my sis. nadakan dibuat...

krgtah tu homework atu. hehe.

xoxo,HANIE

here i am,onel. ;p

2008-11-17T08:23:00.000-08:00

huarghhh...mengantuk eh...pukul berapa ni??12:05pm??
okay, not to waste any precious time, here it goes..today's story.

basically, hari ni suppose to be BLOODY monday, but since everything went smooth,so its a...should i say... 'wonderful' monday?? hahaha
aku bangun kul 5, mandi kul510, kuar jamban kul530.hehe
and so, sembahyang,siap2 and off i go...ke sekulah ku, PTEB.
uhhh...boring sudahku with the school. nada siuk.
tapi its ok lah, next year pindah sekulah baru...ampir lagi, dapat ahir datang..
yea..yea..!!

after school..
apa ku buat?umm..balik rumah, tukar baju, menunaikan rukun islam yang pertama, then naik, masuk bilik, susun bantal, and before tu view friendster, check message and ceta-ceta jap arah msn baru tidur.
after school ,it's a MUST to take a nap (atleast) or tidur sepanjang petang. haha. ngaleh kaliah.
okay, aku bangun kul5ptg. i was in a rush,since my aunt on the way sudah kan fetch me. coz today aku jaga nini.
yata aku mandi, masih lagi ada shampoo arah my hair masa karingkan rambut. huhu. biar tia, keadaan memaksa. ahhahah

4hours aku duduk2, jaga nini, di klinki kiarong, aku just watch tv, siaran Brunei saja ada, but ALHAMDULILLAH jua daripada nadakan.
aku liat this tv series, HEROES-2. Aku suka, Gabriel Gray (Sylar) - ZACHARY QUINTO. Not just badannya lawa, tapi structure mukanya, skin tonenya, eyy...he's my type!
hehehehe. nanti ku simpan a bunch of gambarnya sini ahh...hehe.

okay so, now. i'm stuck dapan laptop ni, typing...untuk hidangan para pembaca blogku. haha.
i got lots hw ni kan d antar esok, sociology, english and yea, hang tuah correction.
honestly, i'm not good ni Hikayat Hang Tuah a, i don't really know how to answer the question. my teacher selalu cakap, "JAWAP MENGIKUT KEHENDAK SOALAN"
aiyooo...if a personal tutor bisai ni, yang handsome lah *blushing* haha

review untuk esok,
- English di class
- Sociology... i thibk di Computer Lab kali.
- Geography; Miss Lim kan explain apa yang kami salim tadi. brapa page tu, 3 kah??
- Bhs Melayu, kami main scrabble ad not to forget, submit HT corrections.
**esok balik skolah pukul12. PS ptg.

gtg now, aher dah. kan view fs lagi kajap ni. hehe.
thanks, hanie

WEDDING PLAN (dari si fish)

2008-11-16T07:38:00.000-08:00

1. How old are you?

2. Are you single?

yup. baru putus, 9months ago. GILA

3. In what age, do you think you'll get married?

late 20s - early30s,

4. Do you think you'll be marrying the person you are with right now

hoi, indakan aku kawin sorang kali. haha

5. If not, who do you want to marry?

sapa saja yang sudi. huahuahua

6. Do you want a garden/beach wedding or the traditional wedding?

i want 'jack&sally' type of wedd. haha nada wah,i guess i'll take both. buat dua majlis ler.

7. Your ideal motif?

masuk syurga - happy family with lots of kids. 20, 30, 40, carry on saja. asal tahan. haha

8. Where do you plan to go on a honeymoon?

aku...mau...underwater adakah?haha. for this,i'll let my husband yang pilih our romance destination. hehe

9. How many guests do you think you'll invite?

ikut budget..kalau nada kraja, nada duit, pgl khadi & saksi2 saja. kahwin secret ler hehe

10. Do you want an extravagant wedding or simple wedding?

since wedding ni once in a life (hope so) so, i'll take the extravagant one baby.

11. Do you want the traditional vows or something you'd make up on your own?

i'll conserve the traditional vows but mix it up with my own idea wedd.

12. How many layers of cake do you want to have?

ikut tinggi rumah. haha

13. Do you prefer having your reception at a hotel or at a simple place?

dalam kapal, round kg.Ayer.. hehe romantic ee

14. When do you want to get married, evening or morning?

subuh, kalau dapat.

15. You'd rather have your reception outdoors or indoors?

alaa sudah jua gtau tadi, dalam boat. outdorr ler.

16. Do you like a grand entrance for your groom?

semestinya. he's my raja kaliah. hero always datang lambat but mesti inda dapat dilupakan. ehem..

17. Name the song /tune you'd like played at your wedding?

the oldies song i guess...and yg nyaman didngr like eardrum pun tetidur.

18. Do you want a solemn ceremony or light one?

solemn one.

19. What age do you want to get married?

see ans for question no. 3, thank you.

20. Describe your ideal husband/wife:

responsible, ada bright future, baik arah familynya, always there when i was down, his 'look' blakang kira, yg penting he's my soulmate and my destiny.

21. Do you prefer fine dining or just normal spoon & fork/knife?

depends on my budget.

22. Champagne or red wine?

Air zam-zam

23. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding? days after our wedd, rehat2 dulu.. SABAR...

24. Money or household items? kalau aku banyak duit, household items saja and if not, MONEY comes first. ;D

25. Who will pay for the bills?

Husband & his family collaboration with Me & my family.haha

26. Are you ready for married life?

If ada duit, bila-bila masa saja ready eh. haha

27. Do you think you will still be a virgin until you get married?

yea, mesti la. husband mesti marah tu if inda. kan,husband...husband pun mesti virgin jua.

28. Will you always be true to your husband/wife?

depends. sayang husband.

29. A new house for a newly or an old one?

ni, biar my husband yang tentukan. hehe

30. Will you celebrate silver wedding, gold wedding or diamond wedding?

diamond la beb.

31. What kind of cuisine would you like for your wedding?

the malay-tradition one.

32. Will you record your honeymoon in a cd or dvd?` which part of honeymoon are you referring to?

record?if terecord jua tu hehe. ummm...semua. if yang private, husband & i share among us saja. hehe. *malu*

33. Whose wedding plans would you like to know next? Choose 5 of your friends

um, anyone will do.

so-called "FUN" at language lab

2008-11-15T01:48:00.000-08:00

hari ni nada siuk lah, except for PS, Lunch & English haha.

the fun of big-two (tho' chance tipis to win, kalah saja)

scrabbling thing arah language lab (everyone gone wild 'duhh')

Language lab, as usual.. if ada si Man, syidah & meza, semua dorang ni memanat. tapi siuk lah..

Below, scrable yang sepatutnya kami main but syidah ckp buat saja nama tani & gambar. so, this is it. kinda cute..hehe (garu-garu kepala^,^nama si Mimi missing ni!!!)

hahaha, there they are + me, aku macam ambuk lah kan sana. haha. si Mimi inda mau gila pasal ia MP, takut arah cigu.. huhu

ni aku sampat pose lah untuk blog ku yang boring ni, haha. Aku with Sai, a friend of mine.

Meza & Ezyan. Gambar curi-curi...

Syidah, bilbil's gurlfie...

Manisa & Mimi...

aku baru jua kenal Mimi and Sai, after kami combine class. the students who qualified to enter gp went arah gp class, and the remaining tinggal with us. Iatah start that day, aku baru kenal with Mimi + Sai... and others...

Having lots of friends can slightly kill my loneliness...hehe

aku sayang dorang, they're dreadfully COOL!!!

so 'mati'...

2008-11-14T14:54:00.001-08:00

sorry for the unrecent updated narration from me. :)
i was busy sleeping and having some peaceful rest after somehow my cousins had completely packed up their belongings,'BALIK KAMPUNG'. Hoping they will be back NOT so soon.

I hate last night. My lovely mom had lost her mind when she saw & smell the scent of 'taie kucing' under the baju-baju which it was hers.
I was surprise when mama cakap 'mati tah kamu!' and yeah,i cried. My mom had also gone mad. Mama tendang-tendang gapil,junior & baby. Marah bnr mama.. So, what i did was, aku ambil dorang & simpan dorang di luar. ='(
mama jahat dimalam..

Now,i'm at school. Buat apa?Tunggu masa untuk study..Duduk2,buang masa..
Today's saturday,the 15th.
Looking forward for something that'll lighten up my saturday..

i guess A-level exams abis sudah kali coz the road was ok,inda jammed..Canteen area pun lapang..

xoxo,Hanie.

boring

2008-11-09T05:31:00.000-08:00

today's sunday. (09th nOV.2008)

mcam last sunday jua, dok rumah saja. tidor makan tidor makan, surf internet, view fs, balas mesej+comments+view fs urang, main sama kucing.
hahaha...like apakan, have u seen anything 'STUDY' ku type sana?
tinggal lah tu buku ku dalam beg, hehe.
homeworks pun nada... (as far as i could remember)
kan revise, hey its kan cuti kaliah..save it for next year saja.huhu

EMM...Boring la life ku. nothing's hapenning. to enjoy pun still got problems to be consider.
these massive problems tiring me. banar...
aku muda masih, still young bah to have such problems.

this is my life,boring,yet i still have to carry on.
gotta keep on movin on.
even if you fall, don't let go.
huhhh...

ttfn=tata for now

My Future... (satu harapan?)

2008-11-08T06:08:00.000-08:00

My dream car... honda civic type-r (dapatkah inda jua ni nanti?)

my dream house...ni rumah tiger woods, tapi indalah exactly this rumah yang ku mau...
aku mau rumah ku nanti, ada swimming pool hehe.

well, ni mesti setiap orang mau, "kahwin" hehe. aku..nanti lah, kalau ada jodoh,kahwin lah ku tu..
my wedding theme; grey. haha
awal ku plan ah..its because my sisiter's going to have her wedding bah..so apa salahnya, if aku jua angan-angan kan..hehe

A loving Father untuk anakku...A Loving Husband... Responsible+caring+leadership talent+respectful are the main criteria of a guy that i'm looking for...
good in bed+charming...(hehe, better save it till kahwin saja.)
everyone is good in bed bah haha.

i wanna have your babies...our babies...

Congratulations,Ma...

2008-11-08T05:44:00.000-08:00

okay, malam ni kami adakan surprise party for my mum..well inda pulang 'party'. ordinary party saja, bagi cake, make some wishes and bagi present.
ni aku excited sangatlah haha. mama pun hairan why aku senyum-senyum. hehe..

ni lah cake nya... inda berapa clear coz it's surprise kan..kami semua pun inda kan merancang kan buat this party..

it says "Congratulations, Ma. We love You. You're 1 in a million"
Mama masa tu terharu, this included me. I'm the one yang pigang the cake, kajar2 wah.
we love you, ma...umm cakenya, cake ice-cream..chocolate..

my sister, c adie..it was her idea...bagi surprise arah mama..and her boyfriend, c zul.(should i say, ABG Zul? haha)

ni lah our new member in the house, my sister's boyfriend... he's always there for us... THANKS SO MUCH...

MY adek, c ameng. hee... kami semua hancur..maklum, surprise kan..so, kami buat macam nada lah.. hehe

my broter, the only brother... beloved brother...hehe awal2 my brother inda pakai baju ni, sekali bgamber tu, laju2 ia pakai baju hehe

last but not least, aku..hehe. cali ehh..baru after mandi wah iatah kusut tu ahh..malu nyerr..huhu

***my 1st sister & tunangnya nada, coz dorang shopping**

This party is nothing compare to what mama sacrifices for us. kami bagi card, and dalam tu kami selitkan beberapa kata-kata semangat.Party ni dibuat pasal Mama dapat degree,specialist in Childhood Education. Kami sayang Mama...

our babies

2008-11-07T00:59:00.000-08:00

Kittens..our "CUTE LITTLE KITTENS"
nama alum ada lagi since dorang baru jua hidup di dunia ni kan 3 weeks.. tapi gemuk ahh...cute aa..

yang ni haha..
kawanmu...ia minta lapas sal rindukan ko haha...

I'm Sorry...

2008-11-06T15:41:00.000-08:00

Di malam, my sis asked me to bangunkan ia pukul 2 pagi, then me cakap okay.
me dah set alarm tu kul 2...
so, masa tu kul 12lalu dah (midnight) iatah aku ngantuk, i dont intend pun kan tidor awal, plan kan tidor kul2, kali tetidor lah ku.. kan perform subuh prayer pun nda lagi tbangun...
my sis HAVING EXAM ni karang kul8 a, she haven't revise most of C.Science.
iatah tadi kul7lalu, my sis tbangun yang hairannya, aku pun ikut tbangan ah. yata ia marah...
guilty pulang ku...

Sorry Meng ahh...
Wish you luck on your exam...
Tawakal saja... ;c

Sorry...

xoxo,
your sister.

Rimas - The Fabalous Cats

2008-11-06T04:35:00.000-08:00

honestly, I still love you... It's hard to erase you, to isolate you away from my heart,,from my soul...

aku inda tau...this song - RIMAS ni...abang suka from the day i left you.
i didn't know ia banyak makna untuk abang...
you don't even know aku suffer from the day i left you.

Lari, lari, lari
Aku lari tingalkan semua ini
Untuk mencari, cari, cari
Ketenangan diri

Pergi, pergi, pergi
Engkau pergi dari hidupku ini
Ku tak mahu, mahu
Engkau hadir dalam diri ini

Keluhan hatiku tak siapa yang tahu
Ku simpan semua sebak di dada
Biar ku yang terluka
Pernahkah kau mengerti caraku memujukmu
Pernahkah kau hargai caraku mencintaimu

Lafaskan kata dari bibir
Adakahnya dari hati
Mungkin kau tak fahami maksudnya yang tersembunyi
Titisan air mata dari pipi ke bumi
Pernahkah kau peduli betapa sedih diriku ini

(Korus)
Mengapa
Aku yang terluka
Aku yang merana
Aku yang menahan sisa baki cinta ini
Engkau yang meminta
Aku yang sengsara
Rimas, rimas aku rimas

Rap
Tidak pesona kecundang
Istana jiwa ku goyang
Roboh dan tumbang
Sawan ku lantang
Tidak berpantang
Letupnya siang-siang
Bukannya alang-kepalang datangnya perang
Dan bawa ku ke jurang
Pulanglah sayang janji ku tatang
Ku hapuskan dalang
Dalangnya sayang
Sayangnya hilang
Hilanglah garang
Garang ku Terbang melayang
Terbongkang ku terbangkau terhoyong-hayang
Tak pandang belakang
Terkangkang kira ku tak diundang ku rapuh
Semua tak bertiang janji ku kini kan berulang

(Ulang korus)

Lari lari aku
Lari tinggalkan
Tinggalkan semua ini
Untuk mencari
Untuk mencari ketenangan
Aku pergi tinggalkan
Tinggalkan kau sendiri
Ku pergi, kini ku pergi
Tinggalkanmu

(Ulang korus 3x)

selama ni aku inda tau, you hate me that much.
abang bnr2 hates me..
Oh Allah...

Thanks for everything Abang.
16-08-2007 - kesedihan & kegembiraan

I'm BACK...so as this blog!!! BLOG'S ACTIVATE!!

2008-11-06T00:50:00.000-08:00

for how many months aku inda update my blog ni...
august..september..october..and now is november...
wooww!!3months..haha
macam lama berarbis..if ditinggalkan ni,gerenti behabuk haha.

well, actually i want to close this blog but it wouldnt happen since most of my friends, tanya-tanya 'ko ada blog?' so, apa salahnya kan di hidupkan kembali my blog ni..huhu

and today is 06th November 2008.
today..nothing much interesting happen..
i sat for my o level exam tadi, both papers.. paper 1 and paper 2.
payah eehhh..i completely lost my mind when description essay ku jadikan narrative..
inda bangang ka tu..
sakit kepala hamba ;c

okay, here is my present 'ME' makin lampuh sudah..menjadi wah lamak ku asuh ahh haha

um, apa lagi ahh..
ani saja dulu lahh daa~~

wish me luck. .

2008-08-24T12:40:00.001-07:00

*sorry for the absence of my 'new-update' life stories (that is last few days), i was busy revising*

today,bloody monday!!
03:30AM.

Ani i'm resting. Rehatkan minda after having a short note-taking on sociological perspectives & socialisation. Tired babe..
InsyaAllah i'll pass my sociology. I didn't really workhard but my expectation to get atleast C is high. Haha. Will i pass and dapat C??Haha. Mudahan jua lah..E pun syukurtah huhu.

Karang,8.00am-9.30am is my Sociology final examination. It will be held arah Student Council Room.
Ya Allah, please make me calm as calm as the clam. Haha.
i'll prove to you Sir that i'll never get 'U' for this Sociology. So sad,i get 'U' for last assesment on Geography. Huhuh='(

okay, the bell rings tadi sudah.Got to go.WISH ME LUCK!!

Outta here..
i love you :)

Persiapan

2008-08-17T08:54:00.001-07:00

Today Sunday,17th Aug'08 (11.35pm)

okay..Hari ni was a hectic day for me. Dari tengahari until pukul11 tadi aku jalan, tengahari-petang i went for a window shopping with my sister & tunang (abg ami) then malam jalan with my sisters and my mum,shopping..

Shopping List:-
- curtain for my sis's vogue wedding
- kain for my sis's best ever wedding to-be. (mine is $15/mtr. Mahal jua tu. Free lining)
- kain for raya. Warna grey. Not my pilihan. My mum's. Okay lah. Lawa. Bagi 4 bintang saja hehe. (kain nya $7.25/mtr,lining 4.50/mtr and kain lagi $3+/mtr)
- Johnsons Baby Milk Bath *aku punya (Hua Ho:$5.60)

total semua: u guys kira saja lah;p

iatah semua tu sponsored by my sister's Hong Kong CREDIT CARD. F it was cash,wow!! Tebal tu wallet. Hehe

tadi i was looking for kain warna orange..Ada lawa berabis..But tadi aku inda bawa my money..Hampa lah ku. And the price is murah jua wah, $11.50 kali..Nanti check lagi eh..

Ohh yah, today Gbel marah aku. I don't know kenapa. Asal saja mentioning my ex's ia marah2. Hey we're friends wah. Kenapa pulang kan marah2 ni. Ee..Baru jua kawan sudah tia kan kongkong. Hate it.. U..Jangan marah-marah bah,kenapa kan ni ee..

Bah bah,gtg. Kan sleep awal.

xoxo baby..

Makin Hari Makin Mengancam (hard to forget you)

2008-08-16T08:04:00.000-07:00

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT HARI NISFU SYAABAN 2008

Today, Saturday 16.08.08(11:06pm)

well tadi pagi starts with bangun pukul 4:13 (janji arah mama kul 4 bangun haha) sekali kami bersahur and sembahyang di masjid..
di sekolah, tadi awal datang hehe. bagus juga tu if hari-hari awal datang, elaun pun inda di potong. (yeahh!!) okay, tengahari tu terasa lah lapar..its lunch time kan tapi tahan saja. berkat bersabar akhirnya sampai ke ptg aku relax saja hehe. pretending inda lapar lah. pura-pura kuat walaupun bibir ni kering sudah. kan minta air tapi inda apa, sabar saja hehe
sekali semasa di masjid, I had a lot of fun. ciuk lah baca yaasin 3 kali..at least gugur jua dosa-doas lalu sikit..Alhamdulillah jua..

OKAY, AND YEAH..IMAM nya atu so handsome.. i like him pakai his baju kerja. if he is mine, i mean my brother kah apakah yang penting rapat, i would have hug him haha. yea, he's sweet..adorable..charming.. (only if ia pakai that jubah) before ni aku berabisly inda minat imam.. kenapa? entah, i just simply rejected the idea of loving or liking someone yang entitled to be IMAM. After I met him, pendirian ni berubah haha. dorang pun manusia biasa jua and made mistakes (sengaja & tidak sengaja)
iatah tadi he smiled at me and i was so cair.. oh no!! am I in love or something? its hard to think about it though pasal at the same time, asal thinking of Imam ni, my Suhaidi's face will appear.. Oh Gosh..

iatah, so I made my decision.. I'll try to forget him (kalau buleh both) tapi kan.. eyy makin hari makin mengancam wah si Imam tu..eee..don't smile at me catu lagi..don't ever text me lagi..don't cakap dingdong lagi,,don't invite me to liat movies with you lagi...don't ever cakap something romantic lagi..it's hard to forget u bah mam,,tapi inda apa..i don't mind..i love challenges..see sejauh mana i can let my feelings control my mind..

AIYAA...
hehehe =D chow chow

I Want You

2008-08-14T08:32:00.001-07:00

Today, Thursday 14.08.08 (23:08)

i usually update my blog aher.Well i kinda treat my blog macam my diary. Bukannya ada orang liat pun.Its just me.

Hari ni aku qada puasa. Ngaleh jua eh inda minum&makan a.Hehe. Lemah seluruh badan. Hee. Um,tadi dskulah aku tdor..(Masa lunch lah bukan masa belajar) tired & sleepy berabis wahh..

Petangnya i spend my time surfing internet. Visiting blog-bruneians yang pakar in photography. Handal-handal wah dorang. I wish i could be one of them though i know its payah. Hehe. We'll see cana nanti.

Emm,tadi ke masjid..So macam biasa lah..And yang duty tadi was imam Hj Zainul. And ada kawanku sana. Sakit hatiku ah if liat ia & he act macam nada. So,aku apa lagi..Buat macam nada jua lah. As if kami inda kenal..I don't know why..Sasak ku..(i'm sorry)

tadi abang text aku and kami cerita-cerita about life kami. And so,since this saturday,16.08 (both of us should celebrate our 1year anniversary tapi we're putus udah) iatah aku pun cakap pasal ani lah..Its frustrating tapi i have to say sorry..I told him to wait for me until the time is right. I still love him..Aku kan balik arahnya but will he wait for me??Masa aku cakap pasal ani ia diam saja & try to elak. Aku inda tau apa ia mau. Abang inda pernah gtau wah. Semua abang simpan='(
if u sudah found someone abang, please tell her apa yang abang rasa. Jangan abang simpan. Orang indakan tau abang kalau abang inda share. I want to know more about you tapi you made us as a magnet. I'm the south pole and you mau jua jadi south pole. How can we continue this relationship if you never tell..Never gtau apa yang abang rasa..Sakit abang,syg liat abg catu..:'(

<<..i love you..>>

My My My..

2008-08-13T09:27:00.001-07:00

Today, 13th Aug'08 pukul 1157pm

i'm so tired..Dehydrated & frustrated..
Badanku semua sakit-sakit..='(
um,well hari ni nothing exciting's happen.Macam biasa saja.hari-hari yang ku lalui is partially boring (most of the time,anyway).

My wishes..Um aku mau kurus! Hahah. Nada wah, aku mau fit saja..Sehat..Physically & mentally.
Aku mau study overseas,ambil my degree & master sana. InsyaAllah..If my grades statisfies the government scholarship.
And,i want to be the best! The best of Me! My present efforts inda berapa..I want more tapi payah.Commitments ku banyak.I'm tired oledi.
Last but not least, get married lah wei..After aku dapat my carrier & stable financial position. (target age:26,27 or 28) hehehe

oh yah, dimalam awang gnul text aku. Very suprising. Its not him yang ku tunggu (i'm tired waiting him sudah) tapi he text me. Pasal ia pelupa so aku ceta2 saja apa ku mau. Gpun he really don't bother apa ku ckp. He's annoying. He want people care about him but he never even care about other people. I really hate people macam ia but what can i do, he's my friend & i have to treat him as a friend jua though i know i'm nothing (worthless) to him. And he said that, 'inda lagi lama ur birthday' and i was like "whatever". i thought ia lupa sudah then ia ckp 'manada lupa. Tengah fikir present pulang ni' duhh..Manasajatah gnul..Malas lagi ku,i may sound menyamal tapi inda lah..Its just aku inda mau mengharap. Acting like you're okay with your life tapi sebenarnya inda. Hey,,stop fooling urself wah..

i'm sorry. i really can't take it anymore..
=') g0od luck with ur life

OMG!

2008-08-12T01:43:00.002-07:00

Sorry, banyak error arah spelling & grammar.
i don't check it before posting..Hehe
my bad..

Jerawat di pipi

2008-08-10T15:54:00.001-07:00

Hari ini 11.08.08 (Isnin)
06.25am

obviously,people hates monday morning.Aku pun jua..But today,aku awal bangun though aku kelat sembahyang subuh. (krg qada) huhu.And yah,masa cuci muka aku liat cermin, eyy..Masih ada jerawat di pipi ani..I don't mind pulang of having this jerawat since ia kecil saja sizenya haha

cakap pasal jerawat ni,i have a friend..ia cakap if ada tumbuh jerawat di pipi ertinya ada orang rindu. Hey,siapa rindu aku ah??Hehe tapi bnrlah and aku tau siapa orangnya.. Jeng jeng..Huhu

i know its been a while kami inda jumpa..Macam entah ah..Jaranglah sudah kan jumpa..I do miss him jua walaupun aku a bit bother,why did he lie..I'm hoping he'll tell me the answer soon..(very soon)

missing him doesn't mean aku lupa Suhaidi.He owns my heart..And i'll never forget him. Masa tu i told mama that Suhaidi kursus SPSS (i don't mention his name though) and mama macam reluctant saja. Mama cakap,"biar tia jodohnya orang kerja Setia jua" terdiam jua ku tu..='( bah bah,kalau catu baiktah ku kerja SETIA jua heheh nada wah..I'll try to achieve my dreams!

i gtg now,aher sudah..Skulah lagi ni..Huhu

mimpi

2008-08-07T18:51:00.001-07:00

i don't have any catatan yesterday pasal aku busy..And my brother accident masa he's otw to fetch me up from school.Luckily he's okay..Alhamdulillah..Kereta saja..And duit..4K wah kan dkeluarkan untuk ngusai..Gxla..

Emm..Dimalam aku mimpi..Well,i don't understand actually mimpiku tu..Aku mimpi i was looking for my friend,kan bawa ia jalan sekali when aku krumahnya..Nada orang..Aku masuk lagi biliknya..Inda btantu..Biliknya tu hancur,semua bajunya nada..Hancur biliknya as if he was in a rush kan tinggalkan rumahnya.Then,arah meja aku nampak keychain yang ku bagi ampai2 dsana..Bkn tercicir tu caranya ampai2 a tapi sengaja dtinggalkan..I was sad dalam mimpi atu.. :(

hmm..Kenapa mimpi catu a?Is it true yang ia kan tinggalkan aku?Why?..Its not that kami bercinta.We're just a friend..When he & his girlfriend okay sdh,he started to forget me.. So sad..

apa erti CINTA?

2008-08-05T09:05:00.001-07:00

Pukul 11.33pm (o5.o8.o8)
today..Malam ni i spent my time cerita2 with my ex..He asked me 'apa erti CINTA?' ey, i was blank..Mana ku tau tu..i've never talked about love ever since we broke up.Pernah pulang tapi i've never really expressed my opinions on it.Aku dengar pendapat orang saja,mostly kawan-kawanku.And so,aku jawap..'cinta perlukan pengorbanan' & 'dalam menunggu cinta,masa hanyalah waktu' semua jawapanku sama dgn jawapanku dulu masa before kami putus..

Then,aku pun tanya ia lah..Pendapatnya apa..Ia cakap perasaan cinta ni datang dari hati bukan dari mulut seseorang. (i agree with that) lagi ia cakap, cinta perlu persefahaman..Katanya its normal if kelaie-kelaie pasal kelaie tu menunjukkan tani sayang pasangan tani.Cemburu tandanya sayang..Yea, ani pun aku setuju..

Aku pun ada rasa jeleous jua if ku missed call ia but his number is busy..Walaupun hakikatnya kami 6bulan sudah putus..Oh help,,i really can't forget him..And tadi,ia salah text wah..Tiba-tiba saja hatiku sakit..Emm..

Aku akui,aku lemah in expressing the real me..What i want..Dari damit sudah aku dididik not to burden other's life..Bahagiakan orang lain dulu before bahagiakan diri tani..Its not that mama directly taught me catu but it is how i interprete my situation msa tu inside me (brain+heart)
i tried to express it tapi aku inda pandai..
Sakit hati ku,kalau disimpan sakit berabis..
Kadang-kadang aku salahkan mama.But i know i was wrong. It's me yang salah. Bukan mama..

Selama 17tahun 10bulan aku bernafas,puas sudah ku mengalah..Untuk orang yang ku sayang,aku sanggup mengalah.Kami putus bukan sebab kerelaan kami (aku puas menangis) tapi bukan jua terpaksa..Aku yang buat keputusan ani :) aku takut,aku kan menyusahkan ia..Aku sayang ia..Aku inda mau sakiti hatinya..Aku inda tau cna kn luahkn perasaan ini..

Maafkan aku..

will he wait for me??

2008-08-04T19:11:00.001-07:00

Today is Tuesday,o5.o8.o8..Ani break,pukul0956..And Geography is next..

Um..Dmalam my ex text aku :) well,he said that ia kursus SPSS sane.2weeks sudah..SPSS ni Setia Protective Security Services..29th of Aug,ia abis & he'll start to work dsana jua..Nda jua lama kami putus..Banyak sudah berubah.. :)

tapi hatiku inda pernah berubah..And dmalam aku gtau ia,tunggu aku if you kan kawin..And ia cakap, alum trjmpa calon baru & sane ia menunggu seseorang..(aku kah tu??) haha perasan..Hee

i'll wait for you..if tani ada jodoh,jom tani kawin.. :) i'm serious..But will you wait for me,abang?..

Woops,gtg..My lecturer is coming..

'jgn abaikan urg yg myanyangi tani,pyh kn mcri urg yg bnr2 cyg tane' (abang,o4.o8)

please stay with me forever!

2008-08-03T16:26:00.001-07:00

i pick this topic because..i found that it is irrelevant..Kalau tani minta pun urang tu untuk stay with tani forever,inda jua dapat tu..'forever' apa??Manada 'forever'..I will always love you 'forever' apa tu?Manada tu..Cakap ganya tu..:)

ouch..Sakit ta jua heart ku ni..Oh yah,aku otw sekulah..And today aku akhir..My mum marah2..My bro pun marah2..Aku pun tadi marah jua haha.(Sorry Ma..) Huhh..Payah you know.. :) atu lah, being single ani payah..Bukan ku inda pernah cuba kan mencintai seseorang lagi,kesian yang batah sudah tunggu aku..Tapi entah..Payah ku kan buang cinta lamaku tu..Aku pernah minta ia stay with aku walaupun kami inda lagi together tapi ia inda mau..='( aku yang salah..
i'm sorry..i'm sorry..i'm sorry..='(

pantai lagi buleh berubah..Apa lagi tani,manusia ani kan..Eh tadi aku liat mukaku in the mirror..Wahh!!Gemuk eh heheh..Makin frust makin gemuk ta pulang huhu..

Lets go back to our topic 'please stay with me forever' iatah ni for those yang baca my blog,keep on reading..Prove it to me yang 'forever' ni will remain 'forever'

today,04.08.08..Me and my ex should be four years tapi ye lah,nada jodoh..:) takecare guys..

dia kawanku

2008-08-03T09:25:00.001-07:00

Today..Hmm..Mcm biasa jua..My world gets tougher and tougher..Tadi aku jalan with kaka & abg ami..Liat2 brg pengantin.Huhh ckp pasal pengantin ani teringat pulangku arahnya..Heyy..Cna usulnya a if ia jadi raja sehari a?Must b handsome though ia tua sikit lah haha..

Aku pernah jua imagine ia kawin..Um pakai baju pengantin biru..And aku liat ia arah kem,aku ketawakan ia..Haha sory lenx!! Seriously, aku inda pernah imagine aku kawin sama ia.. i was like mcm having a nightmare if TERimagine abt that..Beristighfar ku banyak2..:) huhu

since he is my first kawan yang tua and pakar 'ugama' so i respect him more dari my other friends. I gve my priority arahnya.Tapi ulahnya sama saja..Nada pun aku nampak mature nya..Maybe ia anggap aku kanak2 kali iatah he act kanak2 jua..Well,he's cute btw..Manja mcm baby..Suka minta attention.. (ai..it sounds as if i like him..Hee..)

awu..Aku suka..tapi sebagai 'kawan' saja.Hatiku msh dimiliki oleh Tuan.1405..I do miss him tapi i don't know..I need time:'( um,kawanku ni baik..Kawan2ku bnyak baik..Alhamdulillah,aku dikurniakan banyak kawan yang baik walaupun sebelum ni aku pernah berkawan dgn musuh bawah selimut.Sakit wah kena tikam dari belakang..Sampai ani, aku masih lagi payah kan trust urang..Especially kawan yang baik :(

lets wrap this up, kawanku..Selamat Melayari Bahtera Alam Baru..Semoga bahagia geng!!Hehehe and also to my beloved sister+her fiancéé, bahagia selalu.Kami tunggu c Naufal..=D hehe

sedikit untukku dihatimu

2008-08-02T19:43:00.001-07:00

i'm here again..Haha
yeah,today is Sunday.And aku tadi bangun pukul 10:10 heheh =)

aku adalah pencari cinta.Terkial-kial mencari cinta.Aku tau cinta yang ku cari ada padanya.Nya yang ku cari is 'unknown'
bukan mudah mencari jodoh.Though Dr.Fadilah Kamsah quoted that jodoh tani berhampiran dgn tani & we have to work hard to reveal our jodoh ani.

Aku cuma ingin tau, siapa jodohku..Siapa tempatku menyerahkan cintaku..Adakah dia juga mencari aku??='( adakah tersimpan sedikit tempat dihatinya untukku?..

Sakit my heart whenever i think of you. 'you' yang bakal menyinari hidupku..
Datanglah..Datanglah..Datanglah..
Simpanlah sedikit untukku dihatimu..

Perjalanan yang menyeramkan

2008-08-01T16:24:00.001-07:00

Well,siapa inda seram if merantau dunia sorang-sorang?Joker arah batman saja kali tu hehe.Joker jadi catu pasal ia dulu baik..
Okay,now..'perjalanan yang menyeramkan'! aku sedang melaluinya sekarang besides ani aku otw skulah & AKHIR sudah..So,its rely seram..Ambl late slip lagi ni huhu='(

menerokai dunia baru mana siuk if sorang-sorang. Um,bnr pulang aku lagi suka merantau dunia sorang-sorang tapi apa yang tani dapat atu mau jua dshare kan..:) iatah being single is payah sebenarnya..Bukan saja sunyi tapi banyak dugaan yang inda dapat dtanggung sorang. Kerana itulah, Allah menciptakan jodoh tani. Tapi untuk menemui jodoh tani, tani terpaksa melalui perjalanan yang menyeramkan dulu..If kitani minta dangani Allah,insyaAllah tani selamat..

Cinta akan datang if dicari..Tapi berusaha lah bnar2.Kenapa?Pasal if tani berusaha bnar2,tani kan merasa bahagia atu lama..Hargai orang yang menyayangi kita..
Akhir kata dari saya, jangan pandang belakang apabila menjalani perjalanan yang menyeramkan..

SEPI

2008-08-01T11:21:00.001-07:00

Kami liat wayang sama-sama..Sebenarnya,aku mau liat sorang-sorang tapi pasal aku dah janji arahnya tani liat wayang nanti when i'm free so aku pun bawa ia lah..:) its not that aku terpaksa, aku pun suka if he's with me..

'sepi' sama jua mcm aku..sepi..Sepi tanpa cinta..Sepi tanpa teman bicara..Sepi tanpa belaian & gurauan manja..Pasal atu aku beria-ia kan meliat cerita sepi..

Honestly,aku tahan supaya inda cry in front of him tapi i can't..Very touching wah ceritanya especially part si pierre andre..:) masa tu aku cry banar-banar..

Yatah masa aku cry, satu titis airmataku tumpah arah lengannya..And his heart beats fast & aku dapat rasa yang ia happy..Happynya lain wah..

masa atupun ia usapkan airmataku..I know ia suka thats why aku biarkan..And masa ku sibuk-sibuk lap airmataku,he was looking at me with his charming smile..Senyumnya lain and aku suka senyumannya masa tu..Sebenarnya i really wanted to hug him and gtau aku inda dpt lupakan my ex..Tapi kami kawan saja..So,apa yang ku mampu buat..Bagi senyum saja..

Masa balik,aku salam ia which makes him a bit surprise..And yeah,aku pun jua.Pasal aku tarus-tarus wah..I dnt knw why..So aku pun say sorry lah..And ia ckp its okay,next time buat catu lagi..Hehe

um,since after meliat sepi kami alum lagi jumpa..and i know,he missed me..Aku pun jua..Hehe.

Bilik Putih

2008-08-01T11:02:00.001-07:00

Pernahkah kamu membayangkan diri kamu berada di bilik putih?
Mempunyai perasaan yang bercelaru?
Memutuskan satu keputusan yang sukar?

Well, aku pernah..Membayangkan aku berada di bilik putih..Aku melihat sekeliling semuanya putih..Dan fikiran berlegar-legar,perasaan bercelaru..Dalam situasi teruk ini,aku mengimbangi keputusan :)

lama juga aku membuat keputusan dan akhirnya, aku sedar..aku mencintainya bukan kerana 'cinta' tapi menginginkan cinta yang terbina bersama Suhaidi dahulu tetap utuh.Aku menginginkan cahaya yang akan menyinari cintaku..Yang akan menghuni cintaku..Agar cintaku tidak kekeringan,tidak dimamah anai-anai..

Dia hanyalah teman.Tempatku bersandar tatkala ku kelemahan dan kesunyian..Dia juga mempunyai sejarah hidup sendiri. Tapi,masa ku gtau ia.."you are my ex boyfriend's reflection" ia marah arahku and aku tau ia frust..ia ckp "walaupun you bayangkan me ani ur ex tapi i'm happy. Happy to be with you."
aku dalam dilema..Tolonglah hambaMu ini,ya Allah..

SURATAN atau KEBETULAN??

2008-08-01T10:46:00.001-07:00

Kalau tani memakai warna baju yang sama without planning..Adakah itu satu kebetulan atau petunjuk dari Allah?:)

as i've told earlier..Kami dipertemukan di rumah Allah & kami selalu memakai warna baju yang sama..Masa atu bulan Ramadhan..Bulan yg suci ani tah kami selalu berjumpa..Pada mulanya,kelibat dirinya langsung tidak ku peduli since my sister menaruh minat arahnya..So,aku pun malas ingau lah..

But then,hatiku tertarik untuk memerhatikannya & menyelami budi pekertinya.Kami selalu memakai warna baju yang sama mcm bejanji..Hehe. Aku ada jua pernah TEST my mind..Aku plan pakai orange that night..Sekali ia pun pakai orange jua. I was like "uh-oh..Kenapa sama ani.." and masa aku meliat ia, ia pun meliat aku. I can feel that kami sama2 terkejut!! Kami dua saja pakai orange wah..Hehh..

And ada lagi, masa arah my brother's bestfriend nikah+sanding, i wear baju kurung hitam and ia pun pakai HITAM jua!! Eyy..Apa nii..

Ada lagi..Kami pakai pink..Putih..Biru..Semuanya kami inda rancang..Adakah ini suratan or kebetulan saja??

tapi semuanya cerita dulu lah..If sekarang, kami kan berjanji pakai baju warna apa..Hehe..
And if this relationship still going on, this Raya kami plan pkai wrna orange. I dnt knw why'd he choose that colour.. i wonder why.. :)

Detik Bersama

2008-08-01T10:30:00.001-07:00

Detik Bersama - V.E

bait-bait lagu ini mengingatkanku kepadanya..Detik yang selalu ku tunggu-tunggu. Well, life is tough. Semakin ditunggu, semakin jauhlah harapan..

"biarkan aku bersamamu,
biarkan aku terlena dalam dakapanmu"
lawa liriknya ani..=) seriously, i did tdor when he hug me..i feel safe when i'm with him..he gave me the warmth that i've looking for..
Our relation is not normal:'( i know..And we both know..But we're needing each other..

tapi..Kami jauh berbeza..he's mature and akan berkahwin & aku masih lagi mencari-cari kehidupanku.Kami diperkenalkan di rumah Allah..Inda tau lah,atu petunjuk or apa..Yang memeranjatkan..Setiap kali berjumpa,kami akan memakai warna pakaian yang sama..How cute is that..=)

Menanti sinar yang seakan menghampiri

2008-08-01T00:56:00.002-07:00

Hari ini..Jumaat (01 Ogos 2008)
cuti awam..
dan aku hanya di rumah.
hatiku berdetak-detak sedari semalam
sudah dua kali aku bermimpikan perkara yang serupa..
well, basically inda sama banar pulang tapi the 'theme' is the same.
aku bermimpi dia akan melangsungkan perkahwinannya..
dalam mimpi ku atu lain pulang..ia gtau ia kan kawin tapi wajahnya seakan menyembunyikan sesuatu..huhh
and tadi i did tell him, ia cakap insyaAlla tahun dpn if ada jodoh=)
and ada lagi textnya which amazed me..
"so you are far away from me lah, tanya aje"
i was like..WHAT??i don't understand..
entah lahh...='( i don't knw what to do..
sinarku adakah ia menghampiri atau seakan menjauh pergi dariku
bersama angin yang sejuk dan suram..meninggalkan aku kedinginan..

"I Love Him Since The Day He Left"

2008-07-31T07:25:00.001-07:00

Terlalu sukar kiranya untuk ku meluahkan perasaan. Memendamkan juga aku merasa serba salah dan rimas rasanya. Mungkin aku terlalu muda untuk memiliki cinta. Cita-citaku adalah prioriti utamaku. Usiaku baru berganjak 18 tahun dan sebelum ini ada juga aku menjalinkan percintaan bersama beberapa orang teman, but hey.. we're young! aren't we suppose to have fun? cinta cintun ku pada ketika itu hanyalah cinta monyet. hehe.. cali jua ahh..
And here's the thing... Aku mula merasakan cinta yang mengelirukan.. BAHAYA!! This guy... aku jatuh cinta padanya sejak...Sejak bila ahh? was it after we met or apa ah?..hmm... itulah,..cinta datang tanpa di undang & untuk merelakannya pergi terlalu payah..!!

-FLASH BACK-
kami first jumpa..di Mall, and at that time, he was very warm.. friendly berabis padahal kami baru first jumpa..well, before ani pernah jumpa pulang but we haven't talk to each other..
kami cakap-cakap pasal kawan, pasal kerjaya (he's working and aku masih study) and masa ia ceta pasal kawan, hmm.. i think start ani kali i fell in love with him but i don't know..maybe it's because i'm being sympathic... ia nangis masa becerita pasal kawannya.. so sweet.. and aku pun inda sanggup liat matanya.. karang takut jatuh cinta lagi.. he'll marry soon bahh..

-NOW-
and masa ani..kami biasa saja..though we did confesing our love with each other but we both knew that it's better for us just being friends :) banar pulang, this heart beats fast and sakit when cakap catu but kami..ditakdirkan untuk bekawan saja. we're both are lonely.. honestly, after he left, i started to love him more..huhu

Dia Adalah Hanie

2008-07-31T07:15:00.000-07:00

Blog ini dicipta sempena kemenanganku dalam mencipta 'website sociology' untuk kolej ku. Mulai hari ini dan seterusnya aku ingin membuat nukilanku menerusi blog ini. Blog ini diberi nama 'Dia Adalah Hanie'. Hanie - ku ambil dari namaku. Hanie